Carpe Diem 轉眼

As time goes by, it is so important to seize the moment, which is the meaning of carpe diem. Sometimes it can be to catch a photo 相片as I have here, a moment in time that can be caught visually. The one is of our little one's legs as he fell asleep on the edge of a bed and right before I rolled him back into the middle of the bed. The other is of an intense moment in a card game as they are waiting to go out on a Saturday night.

回憶Other times it cannot be captured visually, at least not with a camera. It is just a moment that must be remembered through memory 記憶and feelings情緒. I remember one Sunday when I was leaving early to help with the children at church and then the rest would join me later. My daughter always likes to go with me to participate, but this particular Sunday she was sleeping so soundly that it was like trying to wake up a little rubber doll that just happened to look like my daughter. Then just as I was leaving I heard this loud child's voice crying out. I thought it was the neighbor's child, but it did got louder and louder. I just happened by chance to turn around and there was my daughter, standing outside on the steps crying and yelling loudly in Chinese "爸爸, 爸爸!" "Daddy, Daddy!" Half scolding me and half crying all the way as I carried her in one arm up the stairs to change before we left 一手抱她上去換衣服, I found out that as soon as she had gotten up she dashed out the door as fast as her little legs would carry her.

I find that there is more of carpe diem in Chinese culture than in some other cultures. Some cultures like to plan far ahead and then stick to the plan, but (allowing for individual differences) has not been my experience with Chinese friends for personal life...which I can appreciate since I am like that as well.

Life as an Expatriate 寓居國外者

I read an thoughtful if moody article on another blog about life as an expatriate the other day. It made me think about what it means to be an expat and why people do it. It also made me think about my own life of foreign roamings and separation from my homeland.

The article by a man who was a professor teaching overseas, described an acquaintance (another expat) who called him to say goodbye. He was sick, tired and alone. According to the author, he had been away from his home for more than 20 years, long enough for people to move away, die or not care about his existence. He himself was now ready to fade out of existence.

I don't agree with this negative view 悲觀的看法of expat life, which I would call the 'exile' life seemingly favored by literary types. Some of these people choose the expat life in cultures that are far distant from their home countries because they want the freedom that isolation brings.

If someone is away from their home for a long time, then they should adjust to their surroundings 適應環境and make it their new home....if they want to be happy. Expat life can be refreshing, stimulating and exciting. At the same time, expats can also make friends, establish a family and learn the language of their new home if it is different. That's what I have done.

I remember my wife and I attending nightly sessions on parenting concerns at a neighborhood church in Taipei where our children were attending summer school 暑期班. We had a great time sharing stories with other parents, and hearing about their hopes and concerns. One mother had just come back from 5 years in Ghana and she was concerned about her children's readjustment to local schools. We learned a lot, but discovered that as parents we also shared a lot of similarities as well.

(These flowers in the photos are commonly planted on hillsides around here...and are a good challenge for my zoom lens.)

Translation 翻譯

Today, I had a chance to translate from Chinese into English for American visitors who came to hear a guest speaker at church. They handed me a microphone to speak into a wireless device. It was fun to do. I had no problem understanding what was said, but it is always listening with one side of my brain while speaking out the English simultaneously from the other side. Usually, it takes me a couple minutes to get up to speed.

So, that inspired me to think about language learning. My favorite way of learning a language is repetition using sentence patterns. Take a sentence pattern and repeat it over and over again using different new vocabulary words. Now you may be saying to your self, “that sounds awfully boring. This person sounds awfully boring, I’m out of here!” But before you click away to another blog, let me tell you why this can be fun.

Language learners, especially new language learners, love new and exotic vocabulary. “How do I say ‘athletes foot’ in Chinese? Or how do I say snake blood? I want to order it to impress my friends.” Well, we can best do this by connecting those new vocabulary words to sentences. Ideas are best remembered in context when they are connected to related concepts. Sentence patterns help us to do this and they can be dangerously effective at times.

I remember I was sitting on a bus while practicing, I have not _____ for _______ (time). I remember saying, “I have not eaten for 3 hours. I have not slept for 3 hours. 三天沒有睡覺 I have not slept for 3 days. I have not taken a bath for 3 days. I have not taken a bath for 3 days. I have not taken a bath for 3 days. 三天沒有洗澡. 三天沒有洗澡. 三天沒有洗澡.” The person next to me understood what I was saying clearly and changed seats…so it worked!!

Reasons For Cross-Cultural Marriages 為什麼有異國婚姻?

Of course this is entirely my opinion and from my observations, but I feel as if there are 2 major types of reasons we can see out there for cross-cultural marriages. The first, and not-so-fun reason, is just circumstance. If you put men and women together in the same place at the same time there are going to be romances and marriages, regardless of the race or cultural background. The army is a good example. The other day, I saw this cartoon漫畫 book and comic book rental store as I was walking by on a breezy evening. I stopped in to see an ex-serviceman who spent many years in Okinawa and met his wife there. It was purely circumstance. He was posted there outside of the U.S. where he met his wife. They even looked similar, but I’ll leave it at that. (This photo doesn't really have much to do with this topic but I took it today's warm weather. It's a nice contrast like these relationships, bright yellow lemons with snowy mountains in the background.)

Another type of cross-couples meet because they are looking for something in the other person that they don’t find in their own culture. A loud, outgoing Japanese 外向的日本人 might look for an Italian to marry. A quiet Italian 内向的意大利人 might also look for a Japanese to marry. And when the two of them do marry, it is quite a surprise! Or, an American might marry a Chinese looking for good food and the Chinese might marry her looking for fast food. What fun these arrangements can be! In our case, my wife was a little scared of the idea of dating an American when she first met me, oh yes I did promise to tell you the story of how we met which I now have down on my ‘to do’ list, but she ended up marrying someone who was interested in her culture.

Cross-Cultural Family Blog Posts Categorized by Topic 題目分類了

I have organized all past posts into categories by topic: children, Chinese culture, cultural differences, food & drink, gardening, holidays & celebrations, language, opinions & rants, our everyday life, and (last but not least) travels & outings. This will make it easier to find those an article on a particular topic of interest to you.

In other news, we made #6 on the list of Hottest China Blogs today! Thank you readers.

Little Emperor 小皇帝

Here's our little 21st century emperor showing his true character. We did not dress him up this way. He decided on his own and dressed himself in his proper role as little emperor of the household. In this 2nd photo, he is demonstrating his early love for photography, like his father and grandfather. He is also the official baby of our cell group at church, though new ones are due to arrive in the not-too-distant future. He was born the week we first arrived there and in fact at the church. I am about to accompany him to a sort of "Daddy and me," class even though he's too young to know what is going on. Ok, so we have kid posts, but not pet posts!

Speaking of emperors, we are really enjoying that drama about the Three Kingdoms period 三國時代 in China. It starts at the end of the Han Dynasty, as it is crumbling and different generals pretend to be "protectors" of the emperor while gathering power for themselves. One of the most capable of these Cao Cao 曹操 is a famous general who is generally portayed as evil. There is even a saying with his name, 說曹操曹操就到 that means 'speak of the devil,' or literally 'speak of Cao Cao and Cao Cao will be there.' Fortunately this drama does not have this type of one dimensional portrayal of him.

The Key to Mastering a 'Difficult' Foreign Language 學外語成功的要訣

After organizing all of my posts, I realize that I haven't discussed learning Chinese in a long time, probably because I have been busy with other things. So, tonights lesson boys and girls is liking the people who speak the language.

If you are out there and you want to learn Chinese, you have to want to communicate with Chinese people 喜歡跟當地人有溝通. If you don't, don't waste your time because you won't learn it fluently. It's easy for language learners to forget that languages are spoken by real people who use it as their sole means of communication, not only by figures in paintings or by those use a smattering of words to show their breeding as happens with the French language in Western cultures. I had a friend who studied 4 years of Russian, a rich language, only to discover after living in Moscow for a while that he didn't like Russians. What a waste of time浪費時間!

Make a friend, or if you are in an area where there aren't many native Chinese speakers, then buy a modern day soap opera 連續劇 and watch it. You may not understand that much but at least you make some sense if you like the modern society as it is enough to put in a couple of years into mastering the language. Then practice, practice, practice. But most importantly, enjoy it.

This photo is of one of my daughter's story books. Unlike the Tang poetry 唐 詩 book I posted about earlier, which we are reading to her, she can enjoys reading this book pretty much by herself. We got it in a bookstore nearby.

Loquats Ripening! 枇杷

These are our loquats in a photo taken a little earlier this week. (click on the photo for a close-up I took with this lens) …the first fruits of a crop that usually mid-March until the end of April in our backyard. We have the champagne loquat which has a tart, crisp flavor that does taste a little like champagne. Loquats have a special association with Southern China, at least in my mind since they are seen in Sung Dynasty paintings originating in that area.

Their name in Chinese 琵琶 ‘pi pa,’ is the same as the beautiful lute-like instrument that is one of my favorite instruments that’s been around for more than 2200 years. The fruit of course is a little smaller than the instrument though we’ve been trying to grow them that big. I found this site that has some sample 琵琶 music you can listen to.

The loquat is also made into a cough syrup, the 枇杷膏 that you can see here in the photo, which is just as effective and a lot better tasting than Western cough syrups. From what I have seen, they brew it up into a thick syrup sometimes adding honey though we usually buy the packaged types.

Invitations in Chinese and American Culture 請客: 中國文化與美國文化

From my experience, invitations to dinner or a visit to a home are quite different in Chinese and American culture. In American culture, and I understand this varies quite a bit depending on the age group and region of the country, we tend to be more formal in our invitations. Especially, if say a husband and wife invites you to go to their house for dinner they want to know beforehand exactly how many people are coming. If it is a more formal get together, such as a child’s birthday party, there will be invitations 請帖 and RSVPs (respondez vous sil vous plais, HA! so those 3 years of French in junior high did have some use!)

Invitations in Chinese culture are rarely very far ahead of time, unless there is a specific reason to do so. Also, the number of people seems to be flexible as well. Sometimes fewer people will come and sometimes more will come than is expected. Last minute changes of plans that might annoy Americans are quite common, which is a nice norm for those like me who love to procrastinate. I also like the spontaneity. I never quite know what we are going to do when with Chinese friends because it depends on the group feeling at the moment. I remember we had quite a few good times driving to this or that event or going out to eat with friends at the spur of the moment.

The outlay of dinners at a host’s house are also different. At an American household, we at least have the aspiration to dinner with fine china 瓷器, table clothes 亞麻布 桌布 and nice décor even if it doesn’t always happen that way. At a dinner at a Chinese friend’s house the emphasis is on the good food and conversation, not the fine china. So don’t expect that formal elegant candle-lit dinner.

St. Patrick's Day 帕特里克的天

It’s St. Patrick’s Day! Well, at least it’s a traditional American-style St. Patrick’s Day dinner. We went over to my parents for dinner. As you can see there in the photos ( left click to enlarge), there was cabbage, small red potatoes, corned beef and crème brulee. No shamrocks 三葉草. All were very good tasting to me and fit well together as a traditional American dinner.

Corned beef 作醃牛肉火腿 (along with its close cousin pastrami) is actually a traditionally American Jewish dish, but the Irish 來自美國東海岸的愛爾蘭人who came by way of the East Coast borrowed it for their holiday. Nothing wrong with that though. Something tells me ham was not a traditional Easter dish, perhaps leg of lamb??, and does anyone really know what figgy pudding is that we are supposed to request in one of the Christmas songs?

From the historical end, St. Patrick was not even Irish. He was an Englishman who was kidnapped by the Irish and later after he had escaped back to England, felt a calling by God to go back to Ireland and spread the gospel 傳福音. Needless to say, he was incredibly successful at his calling and so became St. Patrick by the Catholic church later. Just something to think about while we swig down those green beers and Shamrock shakes.

The Chinese side of my family knows and cares the most about the Christian aspects and culinary aspects of the holiday, but probably less so about the cultural aspects since no one on either side is Irish. They had fun playing with grandpa and grandma. Our smallest one tipped over a table, set an alarm for 12:15 at night and almost fell rear end first behind the chairs….all-in-all a normal evening for us.

All in a Father’s and Daughter’s Day 爸爸與女兒的一天

A story of two activities. I took my daughter first to meet other students in the park. You can see in the 1st photo here a friend she met who has just moved here from far away. They are also a Chinese and American cross-cultural family like ourselves but they have lived in a very different environment. They live in really nice temporary housing which we visited, but they are hoping to settle down sometime soon. She and her brother are really well behaved and nice children, easily able to communicate both with others their age and adults. That is an important part of why time why I feel time parents spend with children is important.

Some time later, I also took my daughter to Chinese ballet school 芭蕾舞班. It is a really strict school很嚴格, which is good for her. I was talking with a man who seems to be like the Chinese scholars of the olden days that used to write poetry in the moonlight on the lake over rice wine. He was talking to me about his experience catching crabs where he lived last, when I noticed a whole line of heads, the mothers who sit in the front turned around to listen intently on this seafood tale. Apparently, it was fairly easy to catch lots of crabs and then they would steam them up and eat them on the waterfront near where they lived.

Injury 受傷的女兒

Sorry for a temporary interruption in posting here. Our daughter cut her ear roughhousing with her brothers, so we had to take her get her stitched 縫合 up. There was lots of blood and crying, but in the end it was only a little tiny cut for which I am thankful.

It reminds me of when I was 3 and my brother dared me to bang my head on the table. Being a 3 year old boy, I accepted the challenge and ran into the table as fast as I could….or at least I think that’s the story my parents told me. (No, I’m sorry, I do that type of thing now I hope so don’t anyone here email me and dare me to do it again. ) Anyway, it was a messy affair.

The worst part of this evening was waiting in the emergency room 緊急室 for such a long period of time, trapped watching trashy television shows while our daughter was snoring away asleep on top of me. At least she was a brave camper while getting her one stitch.

Teaching Children Across Cultures 兒童班

Working with groups of children is a challenge. There are short attention spans, lots of noise and sometimes not a little bit of chaos. Despite that, I really enjoy serving my time there at church. I have committed to serving there for at least a couple of months.

Especially now that I have my own little ones I realize that these are more than just children, they are the next generation of adults. Since I have been with these children for a while, and earned their trust a bit, I have gotten to see and hear all sorts of stories. They are for the most part either bicultural or have sometimes just arrived from different countries. There are times in which I heard really stories of change, moving, growing up and family life between cultures. Other times, they are just simple but touching stories like that of ‘the girl who had no birthday’ I heard today.

Despite some commonalities of culture, they all come from very different family backgrounds. Some are from very strict families that tolerate no misbehavior. Others are from very loving families. A few, usually the best students, are home schooled. One little girl just has an amazing language and analytical ability. She can memorize bible verses in Chinese and English without hardly any effort.

At the age of the students I am teaching, I find that they want to be challenged. It is encouraging that they don’t just want to be entertained. I try to use both Chinese and English teaching materials in class. There is an excellent children’s cartoon series of stories based on Biblical principles in Chinese called 飛行屋 that I find to be a good resource. These photos are of one of the various children’s worship services on Sunday. They are taken indoors with no flash at ISO 800.

Romance of the Three Kingdoms 三國演義

We're tackling a classic. The Romance of the Three Kingdoms is the kind of book that is so good that I think I read that Mao Tse Tung claimed it as a favorite. It describes the turmoil in China at the Han Dynasty 漢朝 (around 200 AD) as different factions struggled for power and new loyalties were formed.

Especially since this type of literature is ancient Chinese, I'll take this in 3 stages. First, I'll read it in English. I already did that last year after we came back from Taiwan. I remember starting to read it in a Hawaiian BBQ store near the car repair shop the day after we returned. My car died on the side of the street but I got it started long enough (while my family was still sleeping in the afternoon -jetlag) to drive it to the repair shop.

After finishing reading it in English, we are now starting to watch this 36 episode drama you can see in the photo. It is really quite well made with commentary at the end of each disc.

In tonight's episode, which I read as the car battery was tossed on the cement, an elderly man asks this beautiful woman he has been raising to sacrifice herself to eliminate this leader who is threatening the Han dynasty. She is promised to both that man 義父 and to his general/godson who then procede to fight over her. The elderly man then incites the godson to rage over what is happening and to assasinate the leader, thus eliminating the threat to the Han Dynasty. It is typical of the turns and twists in the plots of this tale.

After we finish this drama series, I then hope to find a dog-eared Chinese-language copy of the Romance of the Three Kingdoms and read through it. This 2nd photo has nothing to do with all of this but with someone who is sleeping in MY PLACE on the bed with his stuffed dog, but he's too cute to move.