Chinese/Western Attitudes Toward In-laws 岳父岳母, 爸爸媽媽

I’ll make this one quick since it is late, but I can sleep late tomorrow!!! If God had meant man to see the sunrise, He would have made it later in the day. I have seen that somewhere before……..well maybe not.

I have just been in correspondence with some new Chinese and Western cross-cultural couples and I can see one of the biggest determinants of success 中國西方跨文化夫妻成功的要決 is the Western partner’s attitude toward and relationship with his or her in-laws. If the relationship is bad it can be a source of great stress. Some Westerners have a very distant concept of relationship with the older generation. Closeness in this relationship is often labeled by psychobabble ‘experts’ as “control issues” or “separation issues.” This is probably the number one reason Chinese give for hesitation to be in a relationship with a Westerner.

On the other hand, if it is good 如果好的話, 能帶給人家幸福 then they can be a source of much support and a great source of cultural knowledge. I for one have enjoyed hours of good conversation with my in-laws about Chinese history, culture, various types of food, etc. (Notice the focus in this photo is not on us, but on the lettuce that is getting ready for 8 courses of fish.)